A Thai family can place enormous pressure on their children. This is a fact of life, but it can have a serious impact on any relationship the girl has. I’m sure I am not alone in noticing this.
Most of this pressure has to do with saving “Face”, but it can lead to untold stress for the couple involved. I love my girlfriends family, but I try to discourage my her from visiting them too often. This is not because I don’t want her to see them, it is because everytime she does, she will come home in a state of severe depression.
I have the unfortunate circumstance, that I am seen as the person who is going to restore the families “Face” issues.
Let me give you a bit of the family background:
“They are a poor Isaan family who, as most Thai families, have quite a few children. Due to some past family feud, they feel they have to prove themselves to everyone. The elder sister found a Farang boyfriend, but never married him, they had a child together and this led to serious “Face” loss for the family.”
The younger sister, my girlfriend, used to live with her older sister in the sisters apartment. We weren’t going to move in together until our engagement, but due to an argument with the sisters boyfriend, she had nowhere to go and was forced to move in with me. The family is now placing enormous pressure on us to get engaged and then get married. I would love to get married, but there are complications. To save “Face”, the family have asked for an enormous dowry, or sinsod of 2 Million Baht, to be exact and I will need to give them 100,000 of it on our engagement day. This is money I can not afford at the moment. The other complication is that she cannot get married while she is still in university, we could do the traditional ceremony, but we would not be able to register our marriage until she graduates.
It’s a catch 22 situation that is causing untold stress on our relationship. Am I the only one experiencing these problems? I would love to hear from you all.