Hot or Not? What Thai Girls Look for in a Foreign Guy

Given the huge cultural differences between Thailand and the West, its not surprising that what’s hot in one culture may not be all that in the other.  In the two years I’ve lived in Thailand, I’ve seen guys that would be considered pretty average back home end up with super hot Thai girls.  On the other hand, I’ve seen guys, who back home would do quite well, get ignored by very average Thai girls.  So what’s the deal?  Well, after extensive scientific investigation (read:  many nights spent partying in clubs) I’ve come to the following conclusions about what’s hot or not in Thailand, which should be of use to any hopeful romantics in the country.


 Thai girls want something different – but not that different


The first clue as to what Thai girls want involves looking at the other half of the Thai race:  Thai men.  Virtually all Thai girls in their 20’s or older will have dated at least one Thai guy in the past. The majority of Thai guys tend to be short, thin, and somewhat effeminate.  Foreigners, on the other hand, tend to be taller, heavier built, and more masculine.  All these factors can definitely work in the foreign man’s favor – but only in moderation.  Most Thai girls want a man who is tall and strong – but not some huge body builder or muscle freak.  In fact, most romantically successful foreign guys in Thailand tend to be relatively slim and effeminate compared to other foreigners – though of course larger and more masculine than the average Thai male.  So if you read body building magazines and spend hours at the gym pumping iron, you might want to lay off the steroids for awhile before booking a flight to Thailand. 


Case Study:  The Vin Diesel type is better off staying at Home


Back in the West, a hyper masculine guy with a strong, muscular build like Vin Diesel would probably be considered very attractive to a lot of girls.  Not so in Thailand.  See point #1.  Don’t forget that the average Thai girl is fairly short and as thin as a stick – she’d probably be terrified of someone Vin Diesel’s size!  On the other hand, a guy who looks like Matt Damon – someone who is slim, strong, yet with a slightly effeminate face – would do very well in Thailand.  So nurture your metrosexual side and you may have to beat off the girls with a stick.  



The Clothes Make the Man


Its been written over and over again that keeping a high standard of personal hygiene and dressing with a little class does wonders for the foreign male’s chances of winning over a beautiful Thai girl.  Well, most foreign guys in Thailand must be too busy downing yet another Chang to do much reading, because its amazing how poor most foreigners dress in Thailand.  I’m not even referring to the neo-hippy backpackers because that’s a whole different story, but to the middle aged guys who show up to a club wearing sandals, shorts, and a Red Bull tank top.  In any decent club, restaurant, or bar, the average Thai male will be wearing nice shoes, designer jeans, and a stylist dress shirt.  Follow suit and you will instantly be elevating yourself above 90% of the foreigners in Thailand, and receiving much more attention from the opposite sex to boot.




Skin Color Does Matter


Its unfortunate but true:  in Thailand, people are judged all the time based on skin tone.  The whiter the skin, the more attractive, wealthy, and elite a person is perceived to be.  Little wonder then that the supermarkets are filled with skin-whitening products, that many Thai girls will carry around an umbrella to block out the sun’s rays, and that Thai models are so pale they look like they haven’t been exposed to sunlight since they stopped wearing diapers.  Therefore, a foreign male who gets a kick out of burning his skin to a crisp reddish brown on the islands before hitting the clubs in Bangkok shouldn’t be too surprised when Thai girls don’t give him a second glance.  Of course, most Caucasian foreign guys who arrive in Thailand are pretty white to begin with, so as long as you don’t seek out the sun, you should be fine.  On the other hand, African-Americans, Indians, and Arabs who arrive in Thailand will be at a distinct disadvantage in the dating arena due to their darker shade of skin.




 Loose the Beer Gut


If there’s one physical feature that’s an almost universal turn-off to Thai girls, it’s a large beer belly.  Of course, loosing weight is easier said than done, and poor genes or a slowing metabolism sure don’t help.  Neither does the widespread availability of cheap beer in Thailand or that huge portion of bangers’n’mash at your favorite expat restaurant.  However, by following a few simple tips, it can be relatively easy to stabilize your weight or even drop a few pounds in Thailand.  First off, if you must drink, better stick with whiskey & soda rather than the ubiquitous beer, which is heavy in calories.  Secondly, Thai eateries generally serve meals of smaller portions and fewer calories than the typical gut-busting fare of an expat restaurant, so eat local and you’ll be shedding the pounds in no time.  Fitter guys appear younger, healthier, and generally more desirable to Thai girls, so control your weight and notice the difference in the attention you receive from the Thai ladies.




When All Else Fails


Some of you readers must be thinking about the time (probably numerous times) you walked down a street in Bangkok and saw an old, overweight foreigner with zero fashion sense being escorted by a beautiful Thai girl half his age.  Doesn’t that scene run counter to all of the above advice?  It sure does, but remember that such men are likely being escorted to the nearest jewelry shop or ATM machine in a calculated bid to slowly relieve them of their life savings.  The truth is, no matter what “look” a foreign guy has or how unattractive he may be perceived by Thai girls, there will always be some uneducated girls from disadvantaged backgrounds who will be more than willing to date him provided they receive material support in return.  This may be great for foreign guys who would have no chance of scoring otherwise, but also depressing for many guys who feel like they are being “used” rather than genuinely loved.  However, for the foreign guys out there who are looking for a beautiful, classy Thai girl that’s genuinely interested in true romance, then take the advice in this article to heart and you may very well find the girl of your dreams in Thailand.




209 thoughts on “Hot or Not? What Thai Girls Look for in a Foreign Guy”

    The stuff earlier about looking good and shaping up matters zilch, you have the wallet in the pocket well then you are theee man regardless of how you look.
    BASICALLY, A FARANG is an ATM machine. For a little Thai Floosie it matters shit how big his belley is.

  2. interesting topic, but i cant say i have seen the same things as discussed, i travel to thai for 3 months each year with friends and like most falangs dont worry with western women, but i really dont see the whole “wanting long term commitment” thing, and no i dont pay for women because i dont have to, not saying im brad pitt but just because i know how to talk to girls in general, but the odd thing is that all they are after is a fling, i never get any that are wanting anything more than when i leave, and no i dont spoil them, i hardly pay for anything, this one girl from isaan stayed with me for two weeks before i left and she actually paid for me more than i did for her, and we just agreed to be friends when i left, i still am friends with her and i know what your thinking “oh this young guy got done by some hot looking bar/freelance girl” no that is not the case, im not stupid and know how things are.
    maybe its just the types i come across and i dont just hang in the typical sex districts either (tend to stay away mostly because of the thai girl that the area’s attract)

  3. I enjoyed the original article and think there is a lot of truth to it. Once again, it’s also nice not to read the same old cynicism over and over. Yes, money is an attraction to Thai women, but the ones at home are no different, and even a relationship that starts off as being more employment than love can generate sincere feelings of love and attachment once the girl comes to know the man, like and genuinely respect him. That is if the man has any qualities worth liking or respecting.

  4. I never leaves replys to articles but I agree with every single point made in this artice…..every point made is spot on. nice to see someone take the time to write a genuinely useful read…

  5. I m a manipuri boy frm India, I want to mention tat there is also a group of thai people knwn as AHOMS who live in Assam and they do no look like chinese and they even have very less mongoloid feautres than the other indian mongoloids also, I don’t say tat they totally don’t have but they have only slight mongoloid features and as per as I know they don’t have cross-breeding also except the in the main town Guwahati. They are very tall and they have fair skin also but much darker than other mongoloids. Because of their structure they look very beautiful also because they don’t look like indians as well as they don’t look like chinese as for that it seems they are of very different race and I want to mention that Bishnupriya manipuri have same look like them. It seems both are of the same race. But the curious fact is that Bishnupriyas manipuries are aryans where as ahoms are actually mongoloids

  6. Hi Danny,

    thanks for the suggestion, i learnt a lot and guess i can atleast start prepairing now before i actually go there, but do you recomend if i can get married over there and get her to live with me in india?

  7. hi:) my name is Tu. I’m a Thai girl
    i need marry with Foreign, Because i want
    ^^Have a Good my family in the future^^
    for me of Thai girls in Pattaya and for
    people thai,girls in of night at Pattaya
    shes not good,Not is a Good thai girl. And
    I’m Not like.
    I’m have my work so Good and I’m a
    teacher~i have a degree at university!!
    For want marry Because i want a Good
    my family and hope goto USA or others.
    And now I’m have 31 years old. I’m live in
    bangkok in thailand! I want a good man
    have 35-60 years old, and have a Good
    work and a Good habit, and i have my
    friend ~girls she want too. Because a man
    thai Not Good do have so sad!!!
    I’m hope in the future will a Good man!!
    My e~mail ; [email protected]

  8. Money and white skin go a long way in Asia. But I’m increasingly finding that girls in Asia (and in fact in most countries now) are getting a good education and want to find an alpha male who is their intellectual equal.

  9. This has always been a great read.

    But I continue to ask myself, is it possible to have a genuine relationship with a regular Thai girl where money is not the center issue on the side of the Thai girl? I know there are some wealthy women in Thailand who most likely will not date Farangs due to cultural issues. I want to believe, but have not yet heard of, that there is a Thai lady who loves a Farang for himself only not for his money! Is it possible?

  10. MANDO6971: But I continue to ask myself, is it possible to have a genuine relationship with a regular Thai girl where money is not the center issue on the side of the Thai girl? I know there are some wealthy women in Thailand who most likely will not date Farangs due to cultural issues. I want to believe, but have not yet heard of, that there is a Thai lady who loves a Farang for himself only not for his money! Is it possible?

    If one was to make a hard and fast assumption, based on personal experiences gained from living in the LOS for a number of years, then the answer would almost certainly be NO.

    The facts speak for themselves: even the so called good girls, who work in offices and have bachelors degrees, are on a salary of maybe 10k – 20k THB a month. Hardly enough to have a decent lifestyle in BKK. The ccosts for clothes, shoes, mobile phones, laptops and other paraphenalia of this modern technoloical age, all add up. When you combine this with the importance of face, in Thai society, it’s not difficult to understand that they would look at a farang as some kind of economic cash cow. That’s just the way it is; love will always take a back seat to the need for financial improvement. They will not say it outright but the expectation for a improved life, that comes from hooking up with a farang, is certainly part of the deal.

  11. make is more simple….thai people, also if rich, don’t have interest about farangs also because of their lazyness and limited culture. They don’t see further than their own nose and to accept an avarage farang is like to be in low part of their culture and to accept interest about an higher coltivated farngs is for them not possible due to their limited education and also to their lazyness, so they prefer to hide their minority education comples, with discrimination. Could you imagine a thai rich person abroad, how far can he go with his culture? ….not to mention that also for rich thai, is not easy to get a tourist visa for a western country unless very rich or in company of a foreigner partner.
    Same time I would not worry so much about what thai rich or poor think about us, because their limited brain only bring them to think about money regardless the level of their position in their society.

  12. The dark skin comments may have truths in it, but I did not experience it in Thailand. I am an American-Arab who is medium skin toned, shaved head (bald really–I just finished the job), and hairy most other places. I had several Thai women, “accidentally” brushing my arm to feel my hair. Especially in Chiang Mai, I was the hairiest guy around. A few light and dark skinned women even asked if they could feel my hair.

    I was there as a tourist and not looking for “companionship”, but I did alright. I was quiet and respectful at all times and I was rewarded. Of course, I was there for 6 weeks, so they got to know me and not my skin.

  13. Thanks for the advice. I do need to exercise my “belly” off. I am 52 and have met a 47 year old Thai woman. Our relationship is in the second year. Soon we will be married. We met on a dating website. I look forward to visiting Thailand. The culture is awesome. So is she!
    I like the fact, that Thai women are not into “all the drama.” They also seem to be more relaxed and happy.

  14. Thai females are often interested in white men, but that is often because they love money and sex. But money is most important for thai people but of course it is nice to get a white man for sex. So thai women have often a nice life.

  15. …..more relaxed and happy???? I wish you will never see a thai woman angry, because she will be worse than a tsunami… long as you pay and promise to love (love=money only) then she is very relaxed….so continue pay and support her nice way and she will continue be relaxed….
    good for you, but I don’t envyyour temporary happyness

  16. Just to throw a spanner in the works here… why are so many looking for relationships and marriage?

    Since getting out of two long relationships I find the freedom to do what I want when I want liberating. The problems of sharing life with a woman from an entirely different culture and who you know is there mainly for your financial support is sure to end in tears. Where is the depth in that?

    Stay single and enjoy your freedom… unless you are in need ‘mothering’ of course!

  17. you are right! you are free to do what you want …and they are also free to cheat you and suck all your money…nothing against freedom!!!
    not many farangs come to thailand and marry…only the most naive do it…free to be naive and free to use your naivity…….why not? if you have so much money ro spend to give to the other and at the end is only for a pussy…when with little money you can have pussy and freedom….

  18. not need to marry to learn thai culture, at the opposite, if you marry, you will not be allowed to know so much about their culture, because you will be too busy to support a family which of 100 relatives and you will never understand whet they really say and think, you only will see when they need your money…culture to learn is for free people, not for married ones

  19. Nice life Daniel?

    Shagging sad old white blokes to survive while somehow trying to enjoy the awful future life prospects they have? What happens when they get old… or get pregnant… or get HIV? No-one cares about them and they don’t care about anyone else.

    That’s life and once on the slippery slope to poverty they need to grab what they can while they can.

  20. can somebody tell me about philippines women and life there, i like to spend one month holiday in the philippines but I dont know where to go

  21. I was in bangkok recently for a week. Met a girl in a beer bar, awsome girl for the first two days..
    I paid for food drinks etc and never got a thankyou, it was an expectation of hers due to me being a farang.
    Partied had a great time and she tagged along for the ride… yes she provided sex and showed me around but in the end it was all about money.
    She told me that she was a ‘high class’ Thai girl due to how much money she earnt from ferang, and wasnt innterested in any ferang who didnt have money.
    In the end, I left her after paying 2000 baht for 4 days. She went to get her car, so I did a runner…….
    Thai culture in reverse? lol

  22. Souns like a good deal LT.

    It would cost you that in chips and burgers for and old slapper in the UK and for sure you wouldn’t want sex once she’d taken her clothes off.

    It’s all about money wherever you are in the world these days… but at least Thai girls look the part!

  23. manny, you dont understand….LT, of course in england a woman also ask for money and much more, but what is interesting is that uk woman does not hide behind the word “culture”….but are farangs women only uk women? in some other farangs country, happens also that women pay their own bill or help to pay bills and have real fun and enjoy sex and in Thailand everything is money and everything is blackmail about culture…in other words i dont see the difference between have sex with a thai girl than eating an ice cream…the only difference is the price, not the fun

  24. if somebody has been in the philippines, can tell me how is life there?
    I will spend one month in the Philippines because i am curious but dont know anything about it

  25. My my Kate… touched a nerve did I?

    I speak as I find in the UK Ant45 as stated and it is British women I am referring to. Having worked in Australia, Scandinavia and Holland I’m well aware that so called ‘farang’ women vary from country to country and can therefore have a well reasoned view of British women based on those experiences.

    As for ‘culture’ in the UK there is nothing to hide behind… it’s chips, obesity, piss ups and the benefit system bringing up their kids. They could do with improving their personal hygene too. Thai women are what they are and you have to take them or leave them on that basis.

    I’ve been to Manilla twice and did some local travelling. I felt it was pretty threatening and culturally very confused. Interesting in an American kind of way but not relaxing.

  26. I used to work in London many years ago and I was lucky to meet many women and mostly friendly wanderful women indeed , good in many ways, but without discriminating, i must admit that they were all foreigners, from Colombia, venezuela poland spain and all world and really I must admit that the worst were the english women…even scotish and irish were much much more friendly then english women….always arrogant, they understand only their joke and their way of living and so very boring and easy to get histeric…may be was a coincidence? …..
    Tell me more about the philippines, because if people there is us oriented, then forget it, i dont go there at all, better stay at Laos …

  27. The Phillipines is definately influenced by the US. For those who make money from it, it’s a good thing but the poverty I saw there was awful. They don’t share the ‘gentleness’ that the dominantly Buddhist countries have either and there is quite a bit of religious tension in different parts/islands. I certainly wouldn’t bother going back again. I’ve not been to Laos, but I think you enjoy culture like me… so that’s on my place to go list.

    I didn’t think the Phillipino women were all attractive that either (with some exceptions) and they saw ‘white meat’ as an easy ‘buck’ just as much as the Thai women seem to do… but with an aggressive edge.

    Ha ha about the foreign women in London. It’s a real mixture there and it’s a great place to be, but take a trip outside to Manchester/Liverpool/Birmingham/Newcastle and you will see what I mean!

  28. yes I think that is just like you say about philippines, i felt it, also because they are not buddhist…i think it is also not so safe about crimes. Thailand is most wanderful country to live, because people friendly and honest (almost)…and buddhismus brings wanderful feelings especially at Loy khatong, which i consider the most wanderful moving day of our life….
    the quality of life to compare with prices and the friendly smiling people is definetively a reason to love the Country…the only problems is , according to my opinion, the girls who force farangs to marry with the excuse of the culture, but if we are aware of that and avoid to marry, the is thailand the most wanderful convenient place to live in the world
    Laos is really a beautiful country and also not so many crimes and people smile less, but are very friendly. may be even more buddhismus than in thailand, temple, traditional dances buddhist parties and so on, but sex is not so free, farangs can get problems if invite a laos girl for sex and also laos girls cannot invite farangs at home. but in the big hotels are very very beautiful girls which are allowed to have sex with farangs (only in big expensive hotels), but you must agree with a mamasong (i dont know if right spelling)….but believe me, the girl there are such sexy and beautiful, which no words candescribe their sexuality and beauty…unbelievable!!!! and almost all, not dress shorts or short skirts, but long traditional silk costume and are proud of it and are very proud to be laotian girls….the problems in Laos are the men, they cheat you in prices, not to mention tuk tuk which is a really persecution, same as mosquitos and they cheat you in prices left and right, unless you are hard with them and give them what you decide to give and not opposite.
    I recomend laos for quite peace relax and if you have money, Vientiane has a lot of international restaurants with food even better than at the original places.
    Visa for laos is easy get at border and in case you overstay, you need go to immigration and pay 30 us dollars a month….cheap and easy…..
    to be honest, i still prefer thailand, also if nowdays thailand is too much materialistic and commercial, but still worth to live ….but I am sure you will agree in all that

  29. Enjoyed reading that Ant.

    Laos sounds good for a visit at some point and the fact that the women there don’t throw themselves at ‘farangs’ wouldn’t be an issue for me. I am realistic and accept that I’ve had my best years (although I’m in decent shape) so I will look upon the attention from the Thai women for what it is… a means for them to earn some money!

    It won’t stop me from enjoying it… but I won’t ever start fooling myself that there is more to it than that!

  30. but Laos women dont really look for farangs though they are friendly and accept your approach, but no way you can bring them to sex or spend the night together in private place. They usually dont go with older men at all, they are poor, but very beautiful and wanderfully dressed and look very proud ….but they will never be angry or offend a farang, but not give so much attention….believe me, sex is not easy and only in big hotel with permission of mamasong.
    I am sure Laos men dont have same problems as farangs with their women…But to come to visit Laos is a very very wanderful experience……

    but tuk tuk in Viebtiane…very crazy!!!!!!!

  31. Hi Mando6971…
    Not every Thai girl are the same. The one who has high education and working in a good job they will not care whether you are rich or not. I also read many many of article regarding to Thai girl and money I found that most of those articles were talking about BAR GIRL. Believe me that there are lots of good Thai girl who just care about who you are… not just how much money you have….Good Luck ^_^
    Ps: So sorry for my English… its the second time of comment in English.

  32. Saranyah… you are absolutely right.

    Thailand by it’s culture full of gentle friendly women who just want to be happy and have a family life with a good man of their own age…. then there are the BAR GIRLS!

    BAR GIRLS are what they are and provide sex for the tourists in return for money. It’s the same the world over…. only Oriental girls who offer sex are much prettier. 😉

    All Thai girls should not be ‘tarred with the same brush’. (Translate that if you can!)

  33. Hi Manny,
    …………Thanks so much for seeing us as a general world women . I just feel sad when there are any people underestimate Thai women, but I will not blame them because each person get different experiences. Btw, I will not say that bargirl are bad, I have known that some of them have to work as a bargirl as they have no choice and they have to work for their family.

  34. Again I agree Saranyah.

    I live in England where young girls have babies at 16 (or younger!) and the Government provides them with housing and money (often for cigarettes and drugs) to go on and have yet more babies. It’s a different situation in other countries where children born in relationships meant to last need feeding and clothing when things go wrong.

    Bar girls often have little choice and it’s all rather sad that young lives can be ruined before they get started, but if they don’t mind doing what they do then the money comes in very useful I’m sure. 😉

  35. …..but try go to italy spain and portugal and you will be surprised how women are…they fisically look closer to thai than to english and mentally so much different from both…no southern european woman look for foreigners and almost no women go to bars to find friends or husband and when they marry, they do all the best to keep love relation alive all life…….
    Honestly, english women are not the same and not best example of seriousity about marry, while in Thailand there might be good women who marry men almost same age, but when marry farangs then marry only old men, because they are aware of the fact that old farang has good pension and free from work and can stay where he likes….
    In italy discussion about what i see here above are science finction, but is seems that you are using milions of words to say which woman is good and which woman is bad and believe me, such discussion seems to confirm a negative trend of thai habits…..not to confuse with thai culture culture

  36. Thanks for the info very useful, but I will go in on the African Americans having a disadvantage which from personal experience is somewhat false. I’m in the Military stationed in Japan and I travel to many of these countries and out of all of them I loved Thia it was so easy with no effort at all to get women they approached me not the bummy ones but attractive ones. I paid only once and that was when I first got there I didn’t know what to do with myself it is a mans ultimate playground. The other women I met on excursions and local women around the villa we rented. The only thing I hated was the morning after they like to stick around and make it hard to get a different girl but not as clingy as the girls in the Phillipines

  37. yes thailand women easy and make you feeel relaxed….so keep changing them and change town and meet always new thai gf, so you find always sex and rlax-because if you stay longer with the same thai girl….you might think that is better to live in the north pole than listen to the many problems she will bring. you…..
    so as far as all superficial, i agree with you…but after that superficiality you might wake up and think you are in another country ,,,,in the world of hurt—-

  38. The girls in Thailand are people, some good some bad some rich some poor.The poor ones often end up sleeping with farangs for money, why? Because they are poor, very poor sometimes. Does that make them a bad girl? Or a girl trying to take care for her family?

  39. Interesting piece you wrote, everyone has their own stories and experiences with Thai ladies and how we perceive them, mostly it appears, as a quick meal ticket and walking bank machine. Yes, I have met stacks of bar girls and free lancers, some see what they do as a way out, some just get wrecked and go with the flow.. it’s because of the farang that many ladies see the way out as a sex worker, whether they be a hooker or give out special massage in the massage joints.
    My experience echoes some of what you mention, I’m a older guy, but fit and well dressed when I have to be, and well groomed.. I don’t go to bars, not into that scene, but I met a lot of really nice ladies in shopping malls and cafes, and almost every one of them mentioned my appearance, “no like other men” was a oft used phrase.
    I didn’t go to Thailand to look for a lady but one found me, and we had a long, almost a year, of dating and socialising.. Ding made the effort to speak more English, and I more Thai… I didn’t consider, nor does Ding, our age difference of 15 years her senior, to be any impediment or cause to think of her as a gold digger .. Fact is we split everything, I do give her family money for the farm and we go and help out with the rice harvest every year, this will be my third year doing that.
    It can happen that a proper relationship does work, if you’re really serious about it.. I think it involves wanting to make it work, especially consideration of culture, (I was honoured to be asked to go to the local temple in Ding’s village with her family ) and understand that you are always the guest here.
    Then again, if you’re just here for a good screw, forget everything I’ve said and carry on…

  40. Yes this is a very good description of “Thai ladies” but it also true of “Farangs” who come to Thailand just for sex and beer
    I have been to Thailand many times because I love the country and the culture.
    But put everything into perspective,most Thai ladies are hard working,and sometimes put Thai men to shame because they are not!
    Thai men will will leave his wife and children to fend for themselves because he is weak and go find another woman.
    As for “Farangs”mostly from Europe,ie Russia,Germany and Australia who are “old,fat and ugly”why you not stay in your own country and pick up prostitutes there !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    We honest visitors to Thailand do not want you with your big fat bellies wobbling all over the place and hearing your big loud mouths.
    Have and show respect to Thai people………

  41. I am writing to debunk the whole Thai ladies are in it for the money stereotype. This is a complete heap of crap. I have been with my girl for more than two years. She is a medical doctor, and comes from a poor family in Issan. I have spend much time with her family and they are just pleasant, normal people who offer me food and quirky laughs. I have never, ever experienced any uncomfortable advance about money. In fact, they all know I am 36 and finally finishing my B.S. degree. I am a bike mechanic and tour guide in the USA. I will be moving to Thailand 3/4 time to teach English and music then spend the other time at home to give tours. Someone wrote they have never seen a Thai love a farang for anything other than love. Well, here it is. The way Thai women are written about is as if they are some alien and they are bred to lie, cheat and steal. I don’t get it. I really don’t get it. I say if a man is attracting that kind of person then he should take a look in mirror–that is the reason you attract bad people.
    I met my girl at a hotel I was staying at in Phuket. We did not have much interest in each other until I fell sick and she took care of me at the hospital. She has never had another boyfriend and never considered being with a farang, or anyone for that matter. I was straight with her from the beginning; I am not a wealthy person. As I said she comes from a poor background, is not money hungry but desires love and happiness–just like women all over the world. Her parents are totally accepting of me. Anyway, it is just so simple. I never expected or desired a Thai lady, but ended up being engaged with one. Big deal.

    Do good and good things will happen. Do bad and bad things will happen.

  42. I, like Jesse, have to disagree with the popular misconception that all Thai women are ‘money grabbing’.

    I lost my english Wife after 30 odd years of very happy marriage. I then descended into a downward spiral of Depression and started drinking heavily and smoking again after 30 years abstinence!…

    My Daughter suggested I ‘get away from it all’ and go on an exotic break to Goa, Bali or the Seychelles. Well I heeded her advice but ended up in Thailand for a month instead.

    I fell in love with the place and I fell in love with a lady I met there. After my Girl was refused a Visitor Visa three times. I returned twice more to Bangkok and we married there in December 2006.

    She was granted a Spouse Visa early in 2007 and has been with me in the UK ever since. She has now got UK Citizenship, UK Passport, has learned to drive. Her English has improved greatly (I can now dispense with the mimes!) and can even understand her sometimes!…..

    She told me early on in our relationship that she would be unable to have children, which suited me as I already had 2 then aged 35 and 34. She had been told by two different Specialists that she had severe Endometriosis and damaged Fallopian tubes etc and even with IVF there was virtually no chance of conceiving. So armed with that knowledge we threw caution to the wind…….and now we have a Son aged 3 1/2!!! Don’t believe the Medics!

    We are extremely happy and contented. My Thai Wife is an enormous asset to me and helps me with my business. The age difference of 29 years has NEVER been a problem for either of us!……….I expect someone here will want to urinate on my Fireworks and tell me that when my Son starts Secondary school, I will be 72 and so on……But hey ho. Our Son could not be more loved and so far in his life he has only known love and happiness.

    If there are any widowed lonely ‘Oldboys’ reading this, I would unreservedly recommend a holiday in Thailand……You never know what might happen!…..Oh yes…..She has NEVER asked me for money to support her family either…….Nor did I pay ‘Sinsod’.

  43. @Gerry: While I’m happy that you’re happy, I don’t think you can use one experience to negate something that happens quite frequently. It’s sort of like saying, “I don’t believe that smoking kills people because I knew a guy who smoked 2 packs a day and lived to be 100.”

    That said, I don’t agree that all Thai women are money-grabbing either. However, many are. And many of those women go out of their way to meet “rich” foreigners who can support them in the style they would like to become accustomed to. 🙂

    I think the biggest issue in this debate is the fact that foreigners tend to get caught up with money grabbers more frequently than they do with other types of Thai women.

    I remember back in the early days of the old internet when mostly middle class and rich Thais could afford to have a computer at home and internet access. You could go on most dating sites and meet some really nice women.

    Over the years, that changed. More and more bar girls, scammers, and money grabbers started pouring into the online dating sites trying to land a whale.

    I’ve literally had girls asking me to pay their university tuition in exchange for being my girlfriend within 5 minutes of meeting them.

    You can write that off once or twice but log into most online dating sites today and within minutes you’re bombarded with Thai women trying to chat with you. The vast majority of those gals only have dollar signs in their eyes.

    So, is it wrong to say that Thai women are money grabbers? It depends.

    I’ve done experiments with my wife when she doubts the two different sides of Thailand. Just walking down Sukhumvit during the day she can see that many touts and scammers stay clear when she’s with me but if she walks a few paces behind me they’re on me like a fat kid on a sandwich.

    I have this argument with my wife’s Thai friends all of the time. I’ll have some upper middle-class girl tell me that Thais aren’t like that. When I remind her that she’s not like most Thais (i.e. university educated, middle-class, good job, etc) and my wife can confirm that farangs are like magnets for scammers she has to sheepishly admit that my version of Thailand and the people I meet on a day-to-day basis might be different than the Thailand she sees.

    Is the Thailand we see the same one that Thais see? No. Are all Thais scammers and money grabbers? No, but the ones we encounter often living or even just visiting Thailand frequently tend to be.

    It’s sort of like Pattaya. I think it’s one of the most disgusting places in the country. The worst of the worst. The worst Thais and the worst farangs go there.

    But, can you say that all Thais are like the ones you meet in Pattaya? No. But if you live in Pattaya and say that Thais are this or that way, that is probably a true statement given your context.

    Same for us farangs. Are we all a bunch of drunken idiots who go to the supermarket without shirts? No, but if you were a Thai living in Pattaya you might believe that to be true considering how often you see it.

  44. Hi I’m a Thai dude. Born and raised here, in an upper middle class family with elite education and occupation. Let me tell you something;

    Thai women are ‘extremely’ into the white skin. I have not seen a Thai woman reject a Caucasian man before. It doesn’t matter her background and wallet, rich or poor, Thai- or Chinese- breed, they all dig white skin.

    Thai women are also into the money. I often hear my female friends talk about guys’ wallets, and they do it in the open because in this conservative country it is ok to have opinions as long as they are majority public views.

  45. I believe in love and I have had love relationships but it’s so sad to read some of these comments like “it’s all about money bla bla bla”, well it’s obvious that you have never experienced love neither in Thailand or at home, but you should not generalize relationships based on you r own sad experiences…

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