A question was posed, recently, on one of Thailand’s most popular web forums. A popular author, to that forum, decided to engage us in a discussion about “Who’s a Whore.” The debate raged on for days and most of the protagonists voiced their opinions strongly about what, in their esteemed view, constitutes a woman being a whore and whether, or not, it’s a proper or reasonable term, to be using in the first place. Who is a whore indeed? I decided look at the posing of that question from a slightly different perspective because it illuminates a rather interesting and, perhaps unique, aspect encountered within the machinations of the world of whoring here in Thailand. Before I go on, I would like to first make it clear that I understand that everyone has got their own take on what, or who, can be classed as a whore; it’s not just a black and white scenario. There are many shades of grey in-between the dictionary’s sanitized description; that interpretation being something about a sex service provider being paid for her time and services.
There are some men who ascribe to the theory that all women are whores, it’s just a matter of degrees. Certainly the idea that a woman is willing to provide her sexual favours, to the best possible male provider, goes back to the days when we were all running about in bear skins. Their primeval instinct for food, clothing and shelter remains unchanged. A man’s primeval urge to procreate (read ejaculate) remains unchanged. For that reason, and that alone, there will always be a place for the world’s oldest profession on this planet.
I think most of us can accept the idea that, by strict definition, a lady that provides sexual favors, or services, for direct monetary compensation can be described as a whore. It’s the black and white scenario which, when put to use in most regions of the world, affords a man an uncomplicated way of getting a load of his mind, so to speak. It’s direct and it’s convenient. You pay your money, do the business and move on. Unless, of course, if you happen to be in Thailand; a place where things are rarely direct and uncomplicated.
It appears that a rather strange phenomena, largely unique to Thailand, has arisen where the hotter looking whore’s have created a hierarchal world, within the realms of whoredom, which mirrors the social interplay one might encounter when approaching women in a non-whoring situation. Just because you’ve got a pocket full of cash doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re going to get the pick of the hottest looking whores in any of the bars, or night clubs, you go to here. If you don’t measure up in terms of physical appearance, or dress, there’s a very real likelihood that you’ll be snubbed or, worse, completely ignored. To put it bluntly, these whores have ATTITUDE.
This situation, of course, challenges the very notion of what the function of whoring is about in the first place; the easy and convenient method of getting shag without the anxiety, or added pressures, one might encounter when pursuing a lady in a non-whoring situation. It introduces elements of doubt into the equation. What you may have thought would simply be a cash for sex transaction becomes something entirely else again. The hotter looking whores, the one’s with attitude, will pick who they want to shag thank you very much.
Who, this odd system, serves to benefit is anyone’s guess. One thing you can be sure of though is that it’s not the punters’ lining up to shag the hottest looking whores in Thailand. Market forces, being what they are, will ensure that the demand for the hottest whores will see them rejecting the approaches of those they deem unworthy of their presence. It’s a rather ridiculous fantasy world, within the fantasy world of whoring in Thailand, which, quite often, relegates the older, overweight, and badly presented monger to the scrap heap of the snubbed and rejected. More often than not, they will need to lower their expectations when making a final selection for the night.
This uniquely Thai phenomenon – the whore with attitude – is normally encountered at the more popular go-go bars or the better freelancer venues such as Q Bar and CM2, in Bangkok. Seasoned mongers, or long term resident expats, generally have a better understanding of how this ‘Alice In Wonderland’ world, of the whore with attitude, all seems to work. Newcomers, thinking that they’ve always got the girl they wanted, are only getting the girl that allowed herself to be picked up.
If you go to any of the above mentioned locations, and take a moment to observe what’s actually happening, you’ll see some intricate tactics going on. The fact is the girls will choose you, as much as you choose them, by placing themselves in your general vicinity, establishing eye contact and making themselves available to your approach. Those that want to avoid being approached, by punters considered unworthy, will relocate to a different part of the bar or night club.
In one of my earlier submissions I mentioned the sponsorship setup that many of the hotter freelancers have; they can often have multiple sponsors sending them enough each month so that there is really no pressure for them to just go with anyone that happens to approach them. They’ll be the ones that decide who they’re going to spend the night with and their selection usually is based on a combination of the punter’s physical presentation and the ability to pay the demanded rate (whore’s with attitude will generally consider themselves to have a higher price tag).
Some time ago I spent the night with a ‘whore with attitude’ that I’d been allowed to pick up at CM2. She was the typical up market Bangkok freelancer, or so she thought, with a fair complexion, of a taller stature and a well endowed cleavage. On the way back to the hotel I was informed that she didn’t work all that often, due to the fact that she had a couple of ‘sugar daddies’ overseas, and I’d been given the priveledge of giving her a seeing to because she was feeling horny. I should be so lucky!
Another location with an abundance of whore’s with attitude is Q Bar, in Bangkok. A couple of recent visits there reinforced the premise of the whore with attitude. My first visit was unplanned. I turned up there in a pair of jeans and a rugby jumper. Needless to say, my presence was barely noticed by those that consider themselves the elite of Bangkok’s hierarchy of whoredom. The next night I presented myself wearing my weekend millionaire’s attire and, after flashing a handful of thousand baht notes while paying for my drink, was soon smiling at, and making eye contact with, a number of the ‘elite’. This of course is the complete and utter absurdity of the Bangkok whoring scene. Regardless of how hot, or elite, these ladies think they might be, they’ll never be as hot as the hottest non-whoring girls that can be seen at Siam Paragon, etc. Of course, in their little fantasy world, they don’t consider themselves to be whore’s. They’re just working and you’re just paying them for the privilege of being allowed to spend a few hours with them.
The ultimate location, for Thai whores with attitude, used to be the Top Ten night club at Orchard Towers in Singapore. Some of the hottest there thought they had a status that rivaled movie stars. I guess it had a lot to do with the fact that they were making anywhere in the vicinity of 500 -700 Singapore dollars a night and the over abundance of cashed up, horny punters meant that the hottest got to pick who they wanted to go with. Now I don’t have any particular gripe with what they do but sometimes when a girl that is obviously off some rice farm up in the Northeast of Thailand has an attitude that becomes obnoxious, then something’s got to give. On this particular night I was playing a few games of pool at the front bar of Top Ten (back in the days before it became top five). I’d put my beer on the bar and, after playing a couple of shots, I moved to pick up my beer again. A number of whores with attitude were standing in front of the area where my beer was positioned so I politely said ‘excuse me’. A couple of them moved but one wouldn’t. I said excuse me again and she still wouldn’t budge so I tried to push my way past. She turned with her nose in the air and said ‘get away’ or something to that effect. Big mistake on her part because she’d forgotten that we weren’t in Thailand and that there’s no backup up from a local mafia or the boys in brown. Given the same situation back in Thailand most farang, including myself, would try to avoid any escalation of the situation. Because it was Singapore though, it was much more of a level playing field. I smiled, leaned towards her and said, in my best semblance of Thai “pooying mai mee suparp dikwa khun gep bpai chao naa te isaan. U te baan fan khun kap rot moto sai”. This roughly translates into “You’ve got no manners lady. Better that you go back to your rice farm, in Isaan, and stay with your motor bike taxi driver boyfriend”. I’d pay money to see that look on her face again. The haughty attitude replaced by some serious loss of face. Some of the other non Isaan girls started laughing – which made her cutting down to size even more complete – and reinforced my theory that, when it comes to whoring, there’s only competitors. As I grabbed my beer, the tears started to flow and, with her head bowed, she made her way out of the bar. Some may say I was a bit too hard on her. Perhaps? When you’ve had to turn the other cheek too many times though, back in Thailand, it tends to give one a less forgiving mindset when afforded the opportunity to get some payback.
There’s a time and a place for whores with attitude. The time is every night and the place is Bangkok.
Seems to me that there always an “atitude” that is associated with success here in Thailand. The bar scene included. Seen it many time at places like shark’s bar. But I also see some of the new Farangs who have their tongues hanging out when looking at these beauties, and that gives these girls the feeling of been better than the other rice girls. These Farangs also do not stop telling them how pretty they are, buy them everything in sight and treat them like they treat their trophy wives/GFs back home! So what is a girl to do? have a nice big attitude and think she has made it in the world of whoring. She can afford to do it as long as there are those types of farangs.
I make sure that I do not make eye contact with the WWA (whore with atitude) after recognizing them. I have had it happen sometimes when WWA would try to make eye contact with me knowing fully well that all she wanted to do is to see if I am looking at her, only so she can quickly look away with false pride. Those are the worst WWA’s.
Girls like that, weather from a rice field or from a hi so should not be given any extra attention or even be given the business. There are way too many beautiful women in Thailand for one to be treated like they are treated back in their home land, ie like shit!
But I also have seen some farangs who come here to Thailand and flash their money around thinking they can buy just about any body they want, and I have seen them being rejected by the average rice lady!
You did the right think by reminding your WWA about her place, many times one needs to do so to get these girls a catapulte back to reality…
Yes, well done….A great urban tale. It helps the rest of us to think. I met a guy once who had a similar experience with a woman, a non hooker, who looked as if she had a bit more money that most. She insulted his country. She picked on the wrong person. He is a true patriot. He told her to go back to her house, her husband, and her boyfriends. Then, he said his country, with the help of allies, could wipe hers out with hundreds of missles and bombs dropped high from supersonic aircraft, follwed up with beach assault and airdrop contigents of tanks and ground troops. When she heard that, he must have really put her in her place.
For Roger and Ann. This a story that places all of us on that vast human canvas emanating from the beginnings of human existence. These are eternal themes wrought out by the world’s greatest writers evidenced by the earliest extant manuscripts in our possession. It’s not on the same scale, but it speaks to those of us who cannot access that great body of literature through want of education or lack of interest or lack of Will. It speaks to us because it communicates to our minds and our hearts, at our level of understanding and experience. What is it about? It’s about power, revenge, perhaps vindictiveness, security, insecurities, self-doubt, deep psychological issues, power, economics, marketing and wants. What does it tell us? It tells us who we are. Thanks for sharing. Three claps.
Yes, there is an attitude, but where else in the world do you find girls doing that much for that little money?
Ok, you need to make the girl feel comfortable before she agrees to come with you. That’s a bit surprising at the beginning. But then, most of the time, she gives much more than a working girl would do in any other part of the world.
It’s a chase, but not a so difficult one, and it’s often worth it.
Missed Opportunities
I’m talking to a few geezers now in a well-known pub. They said they’ve had experiences like that, in loads of places including pubs in their countries, other countries and Thailand. I asked them what they did when all kinds of birds put them down, or were rude to them.
You won’t believe it. They said: never mind darlin. I understand. Just move aside. I asked them if some of the birds were adrift. That means, they weren’t in their neighbourhood, or their own country. No back up, no protection. And the blokes said, yes. No problem. They told them, move aside.
Then I asked them if they’d ever had grief with the same kind of birds on the bird’s own turf. Meaning that the birds had backup. Yes, they said. But I said, what do you do when those same styled birds don’t have protection. They don’t have back up. I was thinking payback time. Blokes said yes again, no problem, no payback.
I thought to myself: What a missed opportunity. What went wrong? What’s wrong with these guys. What’s missing in their heads. They had the power. They had the opportunity. I’m sure everyone right now is thinking exactly the same.
What’s wrong with these guys you ask? Years of pshychological, mental and physical abuse by the women in their society perhaps? Being put down as men all their lives by their society’s female biased rules perhaps? You be the judge!
All good comments, thanks for that.
The point I was really trying to make is that these girls, when seen in the context of where they actually are in Thai society, operate way above their stations when plying their trade with the farang. No decent, respectable Thai man – and I’m talking about educated, middle class professional types – would touch any of these birds with a barge pole. They’re soiled goods. They are, pretty much, on the bottom rung of socities ladder in Thailand. That’s why I told that bird to go back to her motor bike taxi boyfriend; that’s her equivalent level in Thai society. Eighty per cent of Thai bargirls have a Thai boyfriend/husband. A background check will reveal that they are not from the upper echelons of Thai society. They’re motor bike taxi drivers, pool hall hustlers, unemployed dead beats etc. As I said, in Thai society, that’s a bargirls (read hooker, whore, prostitute) level and that’s all she can ever aspire to in a Thai relationship. The alternative, to getting a financial leg up in life, is to hook a stupid, unsuspecting, unknowledgable farang. The Thai’s have a great laugh about this because the refer to the average farang (behind their backs of course) as a “kwai doom” (a buffalo being led around with a ring through their noses). The only way to deal with these birds, as I do, is to treat them the way a Thai man would. I don’t mean behaving like an asshole. Be polite and good mannered but never let them get the idea that they are anything really special. If one turns her nose up at you, no problems, there’s plenty more out there to pick from.
Don’t let anyone get away with a disrespectful attitude, especially if you’ve got some power. Unless you like it, or want it. Here’s what George said:
“Don’t accept a poor attitude from anyone, anywhere and at any time, whether in business, on the sport’s field, or in the wider field and business of Life. Stand and fight if you have to, even walk away if you have no choice, but don’t let them get away with it, because they’ll do it again, to you or someone else, and, next time, it will be worse. This applies to all entities, including individuals, teams, businesses, politcal organisations and nation states.” George (1950-)
This article raises a lot of interesting questions which prick the mind. In business, if you are a buyer, decide what you want, search it out, negotiate the price and terms, if you can. If you don’t like it, or afford it, walk away and look in another shop. There are a lot of problems with customer service in shops in western countries. Tell everyone else too, so they can be forewarned and forearmed. Then, potential buyers will decide for themselves. They might want a service from a shop that others don’t want, including, what many think is a really bad attitude. Some think it’s an added attraction. They call it feisty, a wanted challenge. A bit like hunting a tiger and fighting it with one’s bare hands. Or fighting in a combat zone. One man’s meat etc. Different markets for different sods.
As it was mentioned, treat them like their thai husband,boyfriends,giks etc.
So why and how did they develope this attitude.
The answer is of course the stupid farang who come’s here. Let’s face it, from all the stories you’ve read and heard about, I am sure most of you just shake you head in disbelief, cause there sure aint any words to describe what these fools do.
These girls can even backup the stories these guys do.
The old saying “There’s a fool born every minute” keeps ringing in my head.
These whore or any whores have zero power. They only have this over us is because we let them have it.
Unfortunately, there are so many so called buffalo led around the proverbial thai ring, that WWA will still have her place, inThailand and the rest of the world.
The flip side, here in Thailand is that option are far and plenty about.
Cheers
Nice piece of writing.
I can’t blame a girl who has choices for choosing what and whom she wants.
But I can blame someone for being downright rude. They deserve justice. And justice the Isan whore in Singapore received. You were painfully accurate.
Yet it is a shallow victory over the hopeless and helpless.
The whore with attitude is not completely at fault for her condition. They trade a lot for the “dignity” of being a first-class whore. She’s a product of the profession, usually very young (compared to me anyway), ignorant, uneducated, desperately poor and put on a pedestal (even if there is a chrome pole in the middle of it) and being drooled on by the good the bad and the ugly. If I were one such girl I would enjoy my moment in the sun (read: dark), make all the money I could, suck up all the admiration…maybe even make the big score… but I wouldn’t want to be reminded of what I really am (which they know full well)…the most pathetic disgraceful form of human life in her own culture, a pariah among her own people who can’t even tell their parents what they really do.
Being humiliated in front of her “friends” is about as bad as it gets.
But they probably laughed out of shock that you made such a profound insult in their language awaaaay down in Singapore. After all they were basically the same as she and likely felt some connection with what you said.
Hopefully this girl, and/or her friends, learned from the experience. But I never had much luck teaching them anything.
And you can bet it was back to work the next day or whatever….hoping you didn’t show up….and the incident was never mentioned again among them.
I’ve lived with a few go-go girls…one in particular for 4+ years. She definitely had “attitude” and could pick and choose….never went with fat guys, guys who chain-smoked, didn’t shave or smelled bad….Indians, “chocolate” men and Thai men (I’m pretty certain she was a 20%er) were also firmly on her shitlist.
But in the end; when we were at home, in her moments of emotional weakness or at end of some contention she would remark “you know what I am”…..her obvious shame and self-loathing always left me speechless.
I never had to say….. she knew what she was.
Daoism teaches modesty or humility. While I do not expect most people with status, money or power to be “modest”, I do respect people who are modest. I have met many many people who are arrogant and have attitudes because they are rich, pretty or powerful and it is easy to be an asshole like that. But I also have met very few people who are very rich, very powerful or have a high status but they behave in a very kind manner and they are modest, and that is very difficult to be. They have my full respect.
So I guess I will respect and look at a beautiful woman who is easy going and does not put her nose up in the air while I will blow off the most beautiful woman in the world who has an attitude. Especially in Thailand since the options are virtually limitless!
I know a lot of rich people who are modest, lots of Asian people and lots of Thais.
I agree with the respect for modest people. I don’t care if they’re rich or not. I blow them off like you do.
Good writeup, I think I’ve read something similar before.
Anyway, the whores with attitude thing is both good and bad. It’s good for the punters because if Thai whores were not free to choose, then it would all be like going to a Ratchada soapy, and that’s not what most guys want. No, they want the full act, a believable illusion. Also, I think the whores are actually doing guys a favor in making them clean up their clothes and behavior a bit. I am serious about that part!
It’s bad, because it blurs the lines between fantasy and reality. If you spend a lot of time in Soi Cowboy then eventually you’re perception of reality, of attraction, sex and, dare I say, love will get twisted.
When I lived in Bangkok I used to see guys there with such trashy girlfriends, where you know if that guy had just taken the time to socialise a bit outside the bars, then he could most likely have found a much nicer girlfriend.
I have often marvelled at the stupidity of this world. I’ve been sitting in gogo’s and being less than impressed with the girls working there and seeing how each girl who were decent looking would be in higher demand than a real 10 on the outside. It’s stupid. It makes you stupid.
To get the hotter girls, the best action is generally just to wear nice clothes, but not too nice, you don’t want to seem too successful. Go with some friends and have fun (or pretend). Splash some cash around and buy some drinks (tequilas are good for getting girls tipsy). Invite the girls out afterwards to some fancy hotelbar. Serve more tequilas until she starts grinding her crotch against you.
At the end of the night, how much would you have spent? A lot I guess. Probably at least a monthly minimum wage. Is it worth it? In my opinon, no, it isn’t.
If I want to whore then I want it easy and fun. I’d probably go to a Ratchada Soapy and get a really hot girl. Or I would ask for the newest and freshest girl in the club. Or go try to make a gig out of a member club girl. Pay her those 7000 baht a month for an apartment at the NASA complex and then shag her twice a week.
If I want to have meet girls and have fun, then it’s ten times better to go to a club or bar, with friends or some girl I met during the day time or on the internet.
I think it is a step too far to claim that “all women are whores” although it is fair to say “all women want the same as whores” and that is money or access to money. Money equals choice and comfort and this is what women crave. This has not changed since we were living in caves and will always be the case. The notion that women should also work for money is a concept that seems to be lost on many of them. With whores everybody knows where they stand and there are no grey areas. A man pays for sex, the whore provides it and then the man leaves. Everybody gains. In a marriage or romantic relationship the lines become blurred and one side always ends up losing out.
Give me a whore any day or the week.
Yes, fair enough point. Maybe it is a step to far in suggesting all women are whores but regarding the idea that what they want, is no different to what whores want, is spot on.
I suppose I was alluding to what they’ve got to offer in exchange for the money, or access to money, that a man might provide. And that at it’s most basic, or primeval level, isn’t any different. In a relationship the lines do get blurred a bit if you compare the black and white scenario of renting a lady for the night. Having dated a number of ladies, met over the internet dating sites, I would have to say that the experience, for the most part, is entirely underwhelming. Those purporting to be ladies of good standing, in a very short space of time, were dropping hints about gifts, money problems and wanting to go shopping. I even had one that helped herself to french champers at 1700 Baht a glass without batting an eyelid. Needless to say I, very quickly, blocked her phone numbers.
I don’t bother with those dating sites any more. If I need a bit of companionship for the night I just head out to one of the freelancer joints around town. At least it gives the semblance of picking up something attractive in a bar (even though the bottom line is still the bottom line). Anyway, once you’ve lived here for a number of years the whole thing about interacting with Thai ladies becomes rather predictable and ho hum; very difficult for an older farang to hook up with a wealthy Thai lady and the ones we tend to meet are always looking for a financial leg up. Sorry, but that’s the way it is. I’ve got to the point where I just don’t care anymore. I just do what I want to do and when I feel the the urge I just rent one for the night.
Good pointed that how foreigner should do as tourist that how this kind of woman do for the first place is to entertaining tourist so if you want to get in serious relationship then you have to deal with the problem that they may have to start with …good for you megalithic .. i knew you will be fine and know how to handle thai woman in many way… good luck 😉
From a very early age women are aware of the power their sexuality has over men. This realisation grows as they age and the ability to manipulate improves to varying degrees over time. We are all aware of the, “if you mow the lawn then …… ” line and this becomes more subtle over time.
I just cannot see the point in wining, dining, taxiing, courting, listening to, spending money on, hoping to lay some farang woman and spending a fortune in the process. We both know that sex is the bottom line so why the games?
I can lay inifinitely more beautiful women by going to Thailand and paying for it than I could ever hope to do in Farangland where I would spend an absolute fortune in the process of dating some girl with an attitude.
Thai women are more fun, more attractive, better in bed and better people than any farang woman I’ve ever come across.
MY DOG IS MORE LOYAL AND LOVES ME MORE THAN ANY THAI WHORE CAN EVER.
FIND A SPORT ANY ACTIVITY AND GIVE UP BAD SEX AND SHITY RELATIONS WITH ATTUDITAL THAI WHORES NOW.